Mar 5, 2011

We Have Reached The End Of Our Broadcast Day

So I guess you have noticed that I have not posted much lately, and what I have been putting up has been pretty much pure crap.

Truth be told, I have not felt much like digging deep into any particular subject, nor have I had the time to really collect my thoughts or even string more than a few sentences together.

There are just too many things pulling at me from all different directions right now:
  • Work has been so busy that I actually have been doing weekends and a lot of extra hours, which I always swore I wouldn't get sucked into.
  • While working from home has been nice in so far as I am able to help out a lot, my personnel relationships with friends has gone by the wayside.  There has also been the tendency for my wife to abuse it a bit by scheduling lots of stuff in the middle of the day.
  • Skyler has simply been kicking our ass.  I wrote awhile back about how he seems to have given up a bit on trying to work with us and the school.  That hasn't gotten any better.  He is only happy when he is doing exactly what he wants to do, and then he perseverates on one thing until he takes himself up to the point of a seizure.
I know that probably sounds meaningless and whiny to a lot of folks out there. But honestly I am just worn down by taking care of Skyler and keeping my fingers in all the holes in the dike. It has come to the point where I read about what other people are doing, be it a vacation, a new job, or even just seeing a concert or movie, and I think to myself  "Yeah, that is what my life was supposed to be like".

I also don't feel like I can really vent here, because I don't want to hurt any feelings or make people worry. So I am going to kind of close up shop for awhile here.  I will still pop in to read and comment here and there, and maybe I will get recharged and come back.  I might even start up a different place, I really don't know now.

Until then, thanks for all the comments and emails and bloggy love.  You folks have been great.

28 comments:

  1. Best of luck. Cheers, man...

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  2. Oh, how sad for us. But I completely understand. I lost my ability/desire to do all this for several years - and then for some reason, recently, I just had to return.

    But this part I especially get: "While working from home has been nice in so far as I am able to help out a lot, my personnel relationships with friends has gone by the wayside." Interesting that for me, it was around the time I started working from home exclusively that I stopped writing. It's very isolating. (And I can also appreciate the part about the spouse thinking they have unfettered access to you during your work day.) Good luck and I guess maybe I'll see you over on the evil FB?

    cp

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  3. Just a hiatus, I hope mate?

    Looking forward to your glorious return!

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  4. I don't think you're whining at all, dude, you have a lot on your plate and it's not easy. I hope you get some quiet time soon for peaceful relaxation. I'm sure Skyler will chill out too - he's probably just asserting himself a little and his independence. Of course that doesn't help YOU any. Good luck. I hope you come back when things are more calm. We'll miss you!

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  5. All you need is a lottery win, such a whiner! :-) Hopefully things settle a little for you and you come back better than ever!

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  6. I hope you have somebody you can talk to or vent to now and then cuz you need to and it's okay.

    My sister has 2 disabled children and even though she and I are close, even I don't know what it's like to walk in her shoes.

    She's had to take a break from Facebook in the past because she felt like if she read about someone else's good fortune one more time, she would drive her car off the nearest cliff.

    That sounds horrible but I think it's pretty normal. She goes through seasons where she grieves the life she was supposed to have. It must be therapeutic because afterward she has a new outlook and renewed energy to play the hand she was dealt with love and grace.

    That's my hope for you: a new outlook and renewed energy.

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  7. This makes me pretty sad, I have to admit.I'm sorry life's been kicking your ass so bad lately. I hope things start to lighten up for you soon. And If you end up someplace else, let me know, ok?

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  8. What Shannon Green said was really good!

    (I work full time with a mentally and physically disabled little girl.... after my shift is over, I go home. It is nothing like living it!)

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  9. I'm sad that you're closing up shop, but much, much sadder that you're feeling the way you are. I wish there was some way I could help, I really do.

    I think Skyler is just being a teenager and this phase will eventually pass. I know that doesn't make it any easier right now though, unfortunately. It must be very frustrating for you and it isn't fair at all. Teenagers are so good at that crap, aren't they? Grrr.

    If you do start up somewhere else, please let us know where we can find you.

    Best of luck to you. I hope everything gets better. ((((hugs))))

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  10. I will truly miss your posts (the only one I have read on a regular basis) and can't even imagine your stress. Best of luck to you...

    "What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies with in us."
    -- Ralph Waldo Emerson --

    You gotta take care of Number 1 or the rest will feel the fall out.

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  11. We hate to hear the sad truth that we will be without you...as you bring a sense of normalanacy to the chaotic world we live in. I know your up to your ears in day to day life...and so understand. Just know that we are waiting...cause we love you. No whining is not what it is called at all...venting as we all do. I think it may be why so many of us set up blogs. As a voice somewhere we do not have to justify everything we say or do.
    Come back when you can.

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  12. Raising a child who will never grow up and move on is the hardest task in the world.

    My heart is with you.

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  13. Believe me, Chris, I often wonder how you and the wife keep it together. He's a teenager but still needs a lot of help from people so it's hard considering he's trying to gain some independence, probably.

    Also, not all of us lead interesting lives. This is the first time I've had any money in about two years. The IRS was a little generous and the refinancing of my mortgage helped.

    I hope you find some balance, you need it. We're always here when you get back.

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  14. Understandable. Keep your chin up, and we'll all be here when you return. You can't let someone else take your Drysdale for most stolen material this year!! :)

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  15. Take care of yourself.

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  16. I can understand being overwhelmed by life. The last year and a half has kicked my @$$ too. Take a break, deal with real life the best you can, and we hope to see you again when you're refreshed and/or ready.

    (((HUGS)))

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  17. Oh honey- we all get it, yet we don't. If you need a substitute teach for "bad tat Tuesdays". I promise I will try. And by "try",I mean "try and not fuck it up completely."
    You're one of my favorites, always will be- no doubt. XOXO
    -WM

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  18. I'm sorry to hear your path is all uphill right now. Chin up, take a time out, and come back refreshed! xoxo

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  19. Your blog is YOUR blog. It, nor we, control you :) This place would not be a nice place for us to visit, if it made you worn down or unhappy. Real life takes priority, may it behave and be kinder to you. Come back when you can. ((hugs!))

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  20. Thanks Skydad!
    I loved reading and often your comments and insight have helped us navigate issues with our children.

    Keep running!

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  21. I wish there were something I could do to help...

    You've been one of my favorite bloggers, and I will miss you.

    I hope things get better for you soon.

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  22. There is absolutely nothing unreasonable about what you wrote. Do what you gotta do, S.D. We'll be around when you're ready.

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  23. I hope things get better for you. I'll keep checking back to see if you're started up again.

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  24. heh, heh, heh... you said fingers in the dike And what's with the Native American in blackface in the signoff??

    I know what you mean, though: I threw out my back in January, and February in th' Midwest is just deee-pressing, so I've hardly been bloggin' either.

    Take a sebattical but if you move to new diggs, make sho' you lettuce all know...

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  25. Found your blog on my fave read of Catherinettes blog. I am the mom of two special needs kids. My son has autism and is mentally challenged he's 16 and functions at being 4. He lives in a group home due to his need for 24/7 supervison it got to a point i didn't have a choice about that one, but I go see him everyday. My daughter lives with me and is 13. She has adhd and the dr has her on the ppd scale ( peverasive developmental disorder) because of her social and emotional cognitive develpmental delays. I totally get how you feel I do. I teared up reading this because its how I feel more often then not. Then because Im a single mom and my ex hubby and his wife just wont step up and try to help at all I feel guilty for even feeling the way I do at times because Im all my kids have. I think you're feeling what all of us parents of special needs kids do, overwhelmed and exhausted and its ok for us to feel that way. Walking in our shoes is never ever easy. I know I get so upset when I see my freinds post on facebook that they went to a movie, or just had a nite out on the town because I seldom get to do those things. Thank You for this wonderful post hopefully you will blog in the future. =)

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  26. Aw Chris, I'm sorry to see you go. I understand completely and hope that you figure it all out.

    I know you will. Take a break, regroup, and you'll come out on top.

    I know it's not much, but my mom always says, "this too, shall pass."

    Good things, good things, Mazel...

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  27. Tell me it's not true!

    Okay, we're going to plan out "museum and airshow tour" somehow-- my dime. It'll be one of my presents to myself for finishing nursing school.

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  28. Hang in there, Super Dad!

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