Jul 9, 2009

My reign has ended, I go quietly into the night

The PopEye, Becky, has crowned a new champion for the month. The July Firecrotch goes to the always great Splotchy.

Becky tried to soften the blow with this disclaimer:

By the way, your reign as Firecrotch is over. You are a runner up though, so I guess that means your pubes are still smoldering a bit.

Thanks for throwing my crotch a bone (that's what she said!) Becky, but there is no salve for the wound of giving up the distinguished banner that is the Firecrotch.

So unlike others before me (I'm lookin at you Suze!) I shall hand over the award with all the dignity and honor it deserves. Then I will return to my farm with my trainers and mentally throw haybales up in the loft, perform all sorts of exercises designed to improve my wit gland, and return to the contest, not unlike Steve Austin. Stronger. Faster. Better than I was before (do I hear the nu-nu-nu-nu of a bionic wit gland?)

That dude you see in the rear view mirror gaining on you is me, SkyDad!


  1. ooooo, a wit war. cool.

  2. Sorry to hear about your crotch. *snicker*

  3. The fire may be out, but once a hot crotch, always a hot crotch!

  4. Rage, rage against the dying of the light!

  5. Yeah, I'm going to need to spend more time here....

  6. You'll always be a Firecrotch to me, baby.

    I hope your haybale farm montage is a lot like the one in Footloose where Chris Penn learns all the hot prom dance moves.

  7. Anonymous7:48 PM

    Oh you disappoint me. We could've gotten together and figured out a way to make Beckeye pay for taking the award away. When I key her car, I'll put both on names on it anyway :)