Ill take holiday weekend potpourri for 800 Alex.

On this most special of holidays where we celebrate our independence by exploding black powder filled objects and purchasing mattresses at LOWEST PRICES EVER, I wish all of you a safe weekend. Enjoy your time off if you got an extra day, travel safe if you are heading someplace, and don't start the charcoal with liquid oxygen. That never ends well...

I have no news to report, no great stories to share, but what I offer up is worth so much more than that. I have a collection of crap in a folder that will make you laugh, shake your head, and quite possible delete this little web diary from your list on the side bar.

Enjoy:


Anybody interested in a job?


I always wind up sitting next to this dude...



For those romantic times.


Another position that might be open.



Sorry, I think I would just go ahead and die.

And since it is that weekend/holiday and whatevs, here is the first draft of the Declaration of Independence. Check this out, it is really funny:



Comments

  1. A perfect collection of pleasant diversions for this morning. Thank you!

    Have a great weekend!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I loved the craigslist ad.. I SO would have taken it


    The rest are just OH SO WRONG!

    But.. I will not be deleting you from my sidebar.

    You are always good for a laugh

    ReplyDelete
  3. i was LAUGHING until i read the breast fed my dad one. That kind of made me sick.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Delete your blog from my blogroll? This is the kind of stuff I come over here for!

    I'd read the neighbor-schtupping before. It had all bad endings, didn't it, especially about the wife having to admit that the kids weren't his.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I breast fed my dad??!!! I'm gagging.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I just want to know whose idea it was for her to breastfeed her dad - hers or his?!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Love the babymaking story! Reminds me of the saying, "Be careful what you wish for."

    ReplyDelete
  8. My hubby and I read this post, particularly the "Declaration of Independence" and laughed and laughed together reading out our favorite bits to each other!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Is that Craigslist job still available? I could use the $$ to buy some wicker furniture I've got my eye on.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Anonymous11:48 AM

    Oh I'd totally do the Craigslist job. Probably for free just to make the kids cry. Oh, I kid...I kid.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Ahahahahaha!!! The chloroform one is CLASSIC.

    ReplyDelete
  12. I'm lovin' the Declaration!

    Thanks for the laughs, my friend! Hope you had a wonderful weekend.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Glad you all enjoyed it!

    ReplyDelete
  14. I'm sorry, I just read about the breastfeeding her dad story... I can't read the constituion after that. And I was going to eat my breakfast cereal in a minute, but not now.

    ReplyDelete

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