Jan 8, 2009

Quick Joke

Just got this today and had to share it with all of you:

A man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, "Perfect timing. You're just like Frank."

Passenger: 'Who?'

Cabbie: "Frank Feldman. He's a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to Frank Feldman every single time."

Passenger: "There are always a few clouds over everybody."

Cabbie: "Not Frank Feldman He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy."

Passenger: "Sounds like he was something really special."

Cabbie: "There's more... He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank Feldman, he could do everything right."

Passenger: "Wow, some guy then."

Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too. He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank Feldman."

Passenger: "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?"

Cabbie: "Well, I never actually met Frank. He died. I'm married to his fuckin' widow."

9 comments:

  1. An oldie but a goodie -- thanks for giving me a chuckle today!

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  2. Good times. Yet another reason I'll never marry.

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  3. HA HA HA! That's a good one!

    And thank you for the comment on my Dr Zibbs post - after seeing your gift to Zibbs this morning, I completely had to up my game! :-)

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  4. That is, without a doubt, the funniest thing I've heard in five weeks! You know how to deliver!

    Doc

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  5. Heh. I like that. Reminds me of this one:

    A husband and wife are having coffee and talking, and the husband asks what his wife would do if he died.

    Wife: I'm not sure.

    Hub: Would you get married again?

    Wife: Probably. I think so.

    Hub: OH? Really? You'd get married again?

    Wife: Well, yes. I'd be lonely and I'd want to be with someone.

    Hub: And would you stay in this house?

    Wife: Yes, I've lived here for years, I wouldn't want to move.

    Hub: Oh, that's great. I suppose you'd have him sleep in our bed too?

    Wife: Yes, I love our bed. That bed is very comfortable and I've grown quite fond of it.

    Hub: I can't believe this. I die, and right away you'd remarry, and live in OUR house with your new husband, and sleep in OUR marital bed with your new husband. This is rich. I suppose you'd even let him use my golf clubs, too, huh?

    Wife: No, he's left-handed.

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